I realized now that I haven’t documented my final months working for Salesforce.
At the end of July I had a One on One meeting with my manager Steven Butt. He shared some feedback that he alleged people had shared of their experience with me. Much of it focused on my weaknesses and not my strengths. At that point he chimed in that he didn’t see any positive way forward and that he didn’t believe there was a way that my future could be corrected and advised me to start looking for a new job.
This hurt me in several ways:
- When a manager throws up his hands and gives up on me without suggesting concrete, measurable ways to improve, it makes me realize that style of leadership is pathetic and uninspiring.
- My coworkers focusing on the negative. Instead of the ways I was doing well.
My boss didn’t have my back. I felt that there was no loyalty. I had spent 26 years of my life after college to work for the same company that got eaten up by a bigger fish, and then another bigger fish which didn't care about my journey, or what I could bring to the table. Admittedly, they were likely paying me more than my peers, but I don't know for certain. I did suggest that I take a pay cut, but that apparently wasn't an option.
I took this news extremely hard. I looked. For jobs and was in a state of despair, finding that many comparable jobs were requiring other languages and experience with technology that I had not been exposed to. I even found and applied for a couple jobs with the church which didn’t even result in an interview. I especially took that very hard.
It took a long time for Salesforce to process the “Quick exit” package. They approached me with a proposal to work on a high priority project saying “If you stay for this project and help with it, we will postpone your exit until November, after which you can get the six month severance package instead of the six week package".
The damage had been done, and I felt like they were putting a gun to my head in a sense and wanting me to just hold out a little longer until they pulled the trigger. I was embittered by this whole situation and left immediately.
